The road to Boston is a long one

When the fellas said we were going to try the Boston Deli today for lunch, I didn't realize that the establishment was actually in Boston. Then again, it could have just been that the excruciating twenty-block walk in the sweltering September heat made it seem that way. It's probably my fault for wearing a thick, long-sleeved shirt, but why point the finger at yourself when there are others around to shoulder the blame?

Back to the review. The Boston Deli is set up in the basement of an old building and has been furnished in the style of a disgruntled TGI Friday's decorator. But we didn't go to the deli for ambiance, we came to eat. And there's plenty to like at this subterranean eatery.

Three of us chose Philly sandwich — the daily special — in one form or another and it was actually very good. Mine came as a toasted baguette covered with beef, peppers and melted Swiss cheese. The flavor and texture of the sandwich were both excellent and I would definitely order it again. I chose the Ruffles potato chips and a soda to complete my meal and it came to under $7. And get this, you don't even have to tell them to leave off the sauce, because it comes without any.

I'm just glad we didn't go to the place that puts hummus on their sandwiches and went out of its way to say everything was "Organic" ... sounds creepy, eh?

Man-up possibilities: 8
Food quality: 8
Service: 8
Overall: 8

Quotes of the day
He is a good texter. I'll give him that.
I've decided I'm not going to hide what I'm really all about.
Liechtenstein.
I used to make funnel cakes.
We'd better get back if we're going to make it before dark.

buzz! smash = 2.5 lbs. o' beef.

i don't even know where to begin with this gpak review, there are so many ways it could go. and not in a good way. benadryl. personal space. digital. check it (obilg shades flip).

let's just start with the food, then see if it goes anywhere else. hopefully not.

the whole crew, minus jet-lagged gmac, felt a drive was in order to sugar house to a new burger flavor of the month: the denver-based, gourmet/hip, beef-n-bun newcomer smashburger.

the place is great for lunch, if a bit small. it's narrow and has decent seating, with max. occupancy of 85 (or so the sign near the door states) and is bright with a cheerful greet from the order-taker. i think we also chose it because of the man-up possibilities. but i could be wrong.

menu is not complicated: burgers. sides. drinks. there are variations on the 100% angus grillers, including classic (american cheese); spicy baja (pepper jack, guac, jalapenos); mushroom swiss (duh); or, hold on to your hat, create your own.

sides are just as easy: fries, side salad, haystack onions (thin, crispy, delish) and veggie frites. dunno, didn't ask.

speaking of, there are some options involving chicken. mkay. and for the gpak challenged, something called a "smashwedge" (i know), that the menu described as a "large wedge of crisp iceberg lettuce, topped with bacon, chopped tomatoes, red onions and blue (sic) cheese crumbles, with blue (sic) cheese dressing." (I KNOW). hrmm...why try something veggie and add BACON to it. sigh.

my take--i went with the spicy baja because it was, well, spicy. and i went with the 1/2 lb. option, of course. i also went with the onion ring option, to be different. the burger was really, really good. in fact they were all so good we kind of forgot to take any photos of said goodness.

it was definitely full of flavor, and can only imagine the spices and pre-grill treatment of these bad boys. the only drawback, however, is the bun for the big 1/2 pounders are too small for the actual burger needs. small criticism, though.

the haystack onions were also good, if a bit too greasy and a little thin for my tastes. but again, minor details to an otherwise really good experience.

Food Quality: 8
Fizz-o-meter of Coke: n/a (i went with iced tea)
Man-up possibilities: 9
Service: 7
Overall: 8

random quotes. taken in and out of context. we say; you decide.

No matter where we put it, I'll take the over.

I guess I'll assume my position.

I need to focus here.

I'm crapping my pants, if I'm the Tribune.

We are a table of men.

I'm feeling a lot of man love there.

Lemme see my belly.

A lunch without the F-bomb

It happened! A lunch with the GPaK, uh I mean 3PaK — at least today — that went sans an F-bomb. Someone was missing and we'll leave it at that.

Today the crew ventured south for a visit to Jimmy John's. Typically we've shied away from the chain type eatery, choosing instead to visit spots with a more localized tie, but today we were in a hurry (GPaK said he had a meeting or something) so we went with a place that claims "subs so fast you'll freak."

I didn't freak, but it was fast and had we not hovered about the front counter debating on our selection for a few extra minutes, it probably would have been faster.

JJ's is friendly and their staff is ready and waiting to serve it up quickly. The entrance greets you with a plethora of signs — some funny, some small, some useless. But the most important sign, at least a portion of it, seemed to take one of us by surprise today.

That sign, the menu. Obviously the menu is the most important feature of our weekly get together. Without it, we wouldn't starve, but we also wouldn't be able to bring you the large selection of choices that we attempt to partake in on a weekly basis.

Where was I? Oh yes, the process of ordering. Brady stepped to the counter first and went with a standard sub sandwich — those occupying the left side (Sub Sandwiches) of the menu, and those on the cheaper side of the menu. And while I enjoy frugal, the man partially responsible for inventing the definition of manning up slipped up a bit by going cheap today. He completely missed the right side (Giant Club Sandwiches) of the menu which offer "twice the meat," yes I quoted correctly, "twice the meat."

That's where GPaK and I ventured. Greg with the #17, Utlimate Porker, me with the #16, Club LuLu. Nothing froofy about these hand grabbers. Good solid portions of meat — in my case turkey — with a LARGE stack of bacon topping it off. Add the tomato, lettuce and mayo wrapped by JJ's "famous french bread" and I had myself a sandwich — a man's sandwich. I'm bragging as it's rare I truly man up. And I did one better. I added cheese, for more money. It's all shocking, even to me, but it was a complete meal and I was very satisfied with the quantity. I chased this bad boy with some Salt and Vinegar potato chips (so so) and a raspberry iced tea. Yes, I even ventured away from the water today.

The quality was good, but not great. And while I think everyone ate well, it speaks volume that what really dominated our conversation today was the recent burger addition to Salt Lake's dining scene. Brady and I joined GPaK as Smash Burger visitors this week and we can't wait to go back as — GPaK style. In a pinch, and in need of fast food, JJ's is a solid choice and if you are really desperate and can't get away for the hour — or so —they even deliver.

Food Quality: 7
Fizz-o-meter of Coke: Please see GPaK's comment below
Man-up possibilities: 9 (they even have sides of "extra loads of meat")
Service: 9
Overall: 7.5

—SuperScrunch

Again, today, we feature some quotes from the GPaK during the meal. They lack the elegance that Wingnut brings, but they were still good for a laugh.

"Is it weird that this song reminds me of Wingnut?"
"I have officially manned up."
"Is a potato a vegetable? Not when it's a french fry. Then it's a french fry."
"My wife uses vinegar to clean the floor, so I don't feel like eating it."
"Turkey is a woman's meat. I'm just saying."
"Did you just say something about Mr. Winky?"
"If we keep talking about clothes and food, we might as well be women."